Has it been a week?

It is not easy writing a faith blog.  One minute I am filled with lots of inspirations and the next six days I feel ‘distant’.

But it has been a special week.  On Feb 1st, I was scheduled to take care of the OHP for a special mass at night.  If I am not roster to take care of the overhead projector, I would definitely stay away from the special mass for World Day of the Sick because I dislike rushing through dinner preparation, feeding my kid, wait for my hubby to reach home and then, rush off to church.

However, the Lord probably got all my life planned out.  So, I was there and it was a mass that drove me to tears.  If I do not have to take care of the timing of the slides, watching out for the cantor and pianist’s cue and oberving the priest’s action, I would be flooded with tears.  But I had to distract myself as I cannot concentrate and lost myself at the same time.  Still, it was a very revealing session as I was comforted that those times when I was taking care of my dying son, my life have been enriched with the Lord’s calling as well.

Today, I finally get to go and immerse myself in my time alone with the Lord.  I like to see my weekly mass celebration as a time alone with Jesus.  For someone like me, I need a big building like a church, with its magnificent structure, the expression of prayers in hymns and all the drama to bring me closer to God.   If I do it at home, I will get distracted with kids, kettle boiling, meals waiting to be prepared or paid posts to grab etc.

For some strange reasons, I was overwhelmed with gladness and joys instead.  The feeling of happiness is just awesome.  I am not sure what I am happy about but it is the joy of knowing that Jesus is some where around watching out for me.

We are now practising choir  for Easter morning mass and once again, it is a busy Sunday.  Time flies.  Really fast.  To make Easter extra joyful, I am going to start my vegetarian fast from Thursday onwards, which is Chinese New Year.  My friends from church told me I could start on Feb 15th during the day assigned for fasting for Ash Wednesday (which is on 7th Feb, CNY’s eve) but I told them I am the rebellious one who wants to go the extra mile because it is hard.