I remembered the most sorrowful times in church was during Lent, before I was baptised on Easter in 2003. Some of us who were journeying in our RCIA would broke down crying during the masses we attended. Before our baptism on Easter, we have to undergo several rites and those rites really touched the chords in our hearts. A few of us more sensitive ones would really break because of the significance of it.
It is not easy to leave one’s faith to follow another and it is not something to be taken lightly. Six years later, I am glad that Lent still carries a lot of meaning to me. It is a journey of self-sacrifice. I still shed tears during station of the cross because of the unworthiness I feel for Jesus’s sacrifice.
Lent is the times when I will think back of the number of times I had been hurt. The times when I have been equally guilty of hurting others. It is also a reminder to reflect back on what I could have done to make others feel better.
Next Wednesday is Ash Wednesday and it is also the beginning of my vegetarian fasting. A lot of people wonder why I refrain from meat and seafoods (though I still take eggs and milk) and asked if it is compulsory. Sometimes, even Catholics asked me, “Really, we must fast?”
No, we do not have to fast as no one is going to penalise us. But it is an act that I go out of my way to stick to because it is a reminder that I have to do something outwardly to remind my ownself of Jesus’s sacrifice for humankind. It is a discipine I intentionally take upon myself to test my willpower.
When Easter comes, the joy of celebrating the Risen Christ is even much more jubilant as it is also a personal achievement.
Unlike the previous years, now I know fasting starts on Ash Wednesday. This year, I have psyche myself for that 40 days of brutal jokes my dear hubby and sons pile on me. They will go all out to pretend to tempt me with juicy steaks and delicious crabs, two foods that I absolutely love. It is almost a family tradition to see who can managed to play the devil to break my fast. Nah ah, I am going ‘no meat, no seafoods’ for 40 days.
My 13 years old son told me the other day. “Ma….Lent is coming. It means we must refrain from doing something, right? You know what I am going to stop doing during Lent?”
So, I was so proud that my son learned so much from his school and also the church catechism class. I told him, “YES! Just like me, I am staying away from meat. What about you? What are going to stay away from?”
He replied, “Homework.” *doink!*
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