It is the Winter Solstice today where Chinese families celebrate this festival by having a family meal together and also rolling the rice balls call tangyuan or tang yuen.
When I got out from my apartment around 6.20 am, I notice the widow who lived two doors away from me was already busy frying something very fragrant. I admire her for the loving children and grandchildren she has as they always return to her apartment for meals during festivals. Their whole apartment will be buzzing with laughters and I think that should be the way each family is.
After I had returned home from mass, I felt terribly hungry. My flu and cold seem to cause me to feel hungry all the time. So, I asked hubby to go out for breakfast with me and at the same time, I can follow him to the temple where my father-in-law and mother-in-law’s memorial tablet (or what we call the ancestorial tablet) is. He wanted to go to offer some fruits and cakes in memory of his father’s 20th death anniversary and also the Winter Solstice festival.
Since my four sisters-in-law (who are somewhat ‘allergic’ to Christians) won’t be there, I know it is far easier for me to do so. Otherwise, I usually avoid going along. Hubby took a tiny container of the rice balls my children rolled last night. While at the market, I helped to buy the fruits and Chinese kuehs (cakes) as well as hubby has to make a few rounds to find a parking in the busy market. That has been my ritual before I converted to Catholicism. All the meals and tiny details in the netherworld arrangements were my domain.
We headed to temple in some poor, slum area. Back at the time when my father-in-law died, that is 20 years ago, hubby and I were just married. We were broke and at that time, there was a recession and hubby lost his job at one point. So, we do not have the money to buy any fanciful place to put my father-in-law’s tablet. We spent all we had on his medical fees, our rushed wedding (just so father-in-law could see his youngest son married off), his funeral, the big tombstone and other expenses. Though fil has many children, somehow the financial burden fell mostly on hubby’s shoulder. God bless my dear generous hubby.
The temple is rather isolated. Foreign workers seem to make their community there. The high rise flat spells slum. Dirty, crammed, noisy and everything else. On the bright side, there aren’t many tablets there so there was no one there. We do not need to fight for a space to place the foods there. It was just a tiny Buddhist temple with a Buddhist monk and a Buddhist nun.
The two Buddhist monk and nun were rather free and they were sitting there, observing. So, I didn’t do a thing. I didn’t help to lay out the rice balls, didn’t touch a joss-stick or do anything.
I sat at the outer living room and said a silent prayers for my in-laws. May the good Lord have mercy on them, grant them a place in His Heavenly Kingdom because they have been good. In Jesus’s name, I pray. Amen.
Well, it was such a coincident that when I was in the car, on the way to the temple, I had the chance to read an article on purgatory from Catholic News Network monthly magazine. That article which is a FAQ about purgatory and about the judgement days really gave me comfort that there is always a second chance for our deceased loved ones if they have died without knowing Christ.
When my hubby finished his ritual, which was just a quick one, we packed to return home. The nun even asked amusingly, “So fast?” Well, does it matter? It is the thought and effort that counts. I bet my mother-in-law and father-in-law would be rejoicing that after 20 years (my mil died 10 years later), they are still not forgotten and they have the good luck to ’savior’ the rice balls rolled by their Catholic grandkids. Never mind that the rice balls are oblong, rugby ball shape, and some deflated balls. We shall carry on this tradition of rolling balls.
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