I had a short chat with my sister-in-law when we made a stop at her home in PJ while we were on our way to Singapore. She is a Methodist. We talked about how her mom converted to Christianity when she discovered she had cancer, how my sister-in-law’s father too converted and she and her daughter. Her brother became a pastor too.
It is wonderful to hear family members converting one by one. From what she described, the church she attended is a very simple, down to earth church, very committed in evangelising and doing community stuffs.
She also told me about her aunty who lives alone in Singapore. The aunty has a lot of church members who took very good care of her, her meals and even when she had an operation in Singapore, they cared for her as well.
Then, when I went to my nephew’s wedding and visited the church where he is part of the community, I can see and feel how vibrant the church is. They are doing almost everything. They have a library open to the people there. There is a nice kindergarten, facilities for people and basically, a nice place to welcome believers, church members and most important of all, in my personal opinions, people who are just in needs.
To me, that’s the whole meaning of calling ourselves Christians. We have to make available our resources, skills, manpower, love, care and all those basic human needs to every single person, especially non-believers.
And sadly, I feel I have not done enough in this aspect. Is it because I have been selfish? Or is it because there isn’t enough opportunities for me to do my part? I feel it is a combination of both. I dare not strike out and do something unless being asked. And sometimes, I secretly feel that the community I belongs to are not doing enough in that aspect. In my personal views, it is more like an exclusive club membership. Cliques.
Take for example. Our children has a camp. They need foods to nourish them. Do I see many parents coming together to do that? Sadly, it is always the same kind souls who are there to wash the plates, clean up the places, find the meals for them and etc. Sometimes, the main facilitators who are supposed to be teaching the children have to do the tasks as well. When I offered, I sometimes feel if I am overdoing things because I feel worried that others may think I am just showing off. It kind of sucks, you know?
After I have seen how other denominations ‘operate’, I feel certain frustrations building up. They do not have the elaborate things we do. None of those synchronize stuffs, none of those ‘head and shoulder, knees and toes’ kinda of actions. Yet, I think they are doing a great job doing what we Christians are supposed to be doing. Being there, in the fields.
I may sound like I am condemning the very thing I am practicing every day. In a way, yes, I do have a critical mind. I just told my sons, “How come we can meng-halal-kan perjudian using God’s name? Does that make a wrong, right?” I don’t know. That’s how I feel. We do not have enough workers. We are too focussed on building magnificent building and aiming for millions. It is a necessity, of course. But sometimes, I feel we are over-doing it.
Any time, any day, if they have some project that actually get us to go out on the field and do something, like spending time in old folks home, orphanages, orang asli settlements and stuffs like that, call me. Otherwise, please stay away from me because I am broke from all the funds raising.
Phew….I am glad I got this off my mind. I cannot help it because I gotta say what I feel.
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